I wasn’t sure about starting blogging. While doing it, you reveal a lot of yourself. You write your diary without a lock, and not only the family, but the whole world can read it. I want to tell you, why I started anyways.
Does anybody want to know, what I have to say? Will people like my blog? Will they share my opinion on the topics? Won’t they say it’s not worth all the effort? Those are a few of the questions I asked myself. I have this desire to please everybody, to be the person they want me to be. In pleasing everyone around me I sometimes forget what I want me to be like. What my opinion is.
Especially when I meet new people, in a first step I’m rather the observer. I prefer checking out how people act, what they like, what they do. And then in a second step I reveal bits and pieces of myself. It’s a secure thing to do, you can show them the parts they like. But on the other hand, you’re never truly yourself.
A friend once told me: You have three personalities. The first one you show your friends, the second one is who you think you are, and the third one is who you truly are. It’s totally normal to behave a little bit different depending on who is around you. And I absolutely like the person I am with my good friends. But I have to improve my confidence in groups with people I don’t have as friends yet. To make my point of view clear, to tell them my preferences.
|Me, wanting to please everyone. (Yes, I’m the grey dot.)||Me, as I want me to be.||Me, what I actually could be.|
And that’s where blogging comes into play. I write primarily for myself. I mean who’s gonna find my blog anyways? In the blog I can tell whatever I want. I can write about things that I am interested in. About thoughts I would like to share with others. About my opinion and what I consider important.
And maybe some day I will show the blog to my friends and family. I assume that they support me anyways. And then there’s this small chance that someone finds the blog in the web. If they stumble upon the blog, they will browse it and maybe get inspired. And in the end, that’s exactly why I’m writing. To inspire people with what I consider important in this world.
Blogging is like getting to know real people. So maybe it makes it easier for me to meet new people in real life. And after all there are only two scenarios: Either the people like me, and we become friends, or they dislike me, and that’s fine as well. I mean, why should I stick with people who don’t appreciate me as I am?